By Kathryn Weber
When it comes to feng shui, there’s often a major focus on attracting love and maintaining love. But when it comes to relationships, the sad truth is that many teeter on a fine line between being together and breaking up. Either the passion has faded or what were once your love’s most wonderful qualities have suddenly changed from being what you love to what annoys you most about him or her.
Sometimes there’s a quiet death in a relationship, no fireworks, no pleading, just a slow dying of the relationship. There are a lot of reasons why love can shift gears and go into neutral – neither passionate nor antagonistic but a general malaise that can create relationships that simply die of boredom. If any of this describes your relationship, it might be time to infuse some new energy to help create a loving, passionate, caring feeling again.
Feng shui can be used to attract love, maintain love and passion and even rescue it from going over the edge. Bear in mind, though, if there are serious issues like cheating or major differences, the relationship may not be able to be rescued. So here’s some feng shui tips to help pull your relationship from the edge of the cliff or reinvigorate it if it’s gone stale.
When your spouse won’t have sex with you. This points to a major feng shui problem. There can be a variety of reasons why this happens. The bedroom is the first place to start. If you’ve got a broken down bed or mattress, this could reflect the quality of a broken down love life. Remember to invest in a good mattress because it’s not only a foundation of your ability to rest, it’s also the foundation for your romantic life as well. Invest well in your rest and your relationship.
One of the reasons most people give for not being interested in sex? Being tired. A quality mattress could indirectly be a sexy investment! 😉 Make sure, too, that the bedroom appeals to both of you. If the bedroom is a tribute to your love of English roses, then that’s not going to be a bedroom where a man is going to feel especially virile. Likewise, for women. If the bedroom is too cold and masculine feeling, it’s going to be extra difficult to get your wife to heat up. Lastly, make sure your mattress doesn’t come from a previous relationship.
Wandering in relationships. If it’s looking, that’s one thing. If it’s cheating, that’s another. Place a geode tied with a red ribbon at the foot of the bed to solidify the relationship and stop the wandering.
Prior relationships. Another key consideration is if the bed, sheets or mattress are from a previous relationship. If so, they, like the old relationship, need to go. Go furniture and bedroom shopping together – that will get you both in the mood!
Double up around the house. There is an important case for the “Double Happiness” effect. The double happiness is a symbol frequently seen in Asia that represents conjugal bliss and marital happiness. But you don’t have to paste Chinese words around the house to boost your relationship – simply take a cue from the symbol and look for pairs in your house. For example, make sure that nightstands in the bedroom match, and lamps, do, also. Look for pairs in your living room and bedroom, as well. A pair of vases in the bedroom, two bird figurines, or pictures with two items help create a pairing effect, and that affects your pairing, too!
The view from the bed. Another key aspect of couples feng shui and keeping a couple together is the view. What do you each see from your position in bed? Is it a pile of clothes? The kitchen? Or, worse, the bathroom? If so, that will drain vital energy away from each of you – and your relationship. Try to reposition the bed so you don’t have any negative views.
The view of you two. When’s the last time you had a picture taken together when you were happy? And is it framed and displayed in your living room or bedroom – or better, both rooms? Having photos of when you were first together or first married is great, but it relates to “back then.” It shows you as happy then. It’s important to reflect yourselves as happy now, so get out the camera.
Support your relationship. Again, it’s the bedroom that makes or breaks a relationship. Over and over, couples will forgo a good bed and quality headboard. What happens is that the lack of support that a quality headboard makes is in the support of your relationship. The headboard is like the back of a chair. Sure, you can sit on a stool but after a while, it’s very tiring on your back because there’s no support. That’s why chairs are more comfortable – they provide support from behind. The same is true with a headboard on a bed. If it’s uncomfortable, doesn’t allow you to sit up and talk together in bed, or worse, isn’t there at all, the relationship will quietly, and slowly, erode away.